Archive for the Just a Thought Category

Season’s Greetings

Posted in Just a Thought, Miscellaneous on December 25, 2010 by AF

  

A Very

Merry

Christmas

To All

 

I wish every one of my readers a great holiday season

…and I really hope that 2011 will be a happy and prosperous year for everyone, everywhere!

🙂

Adam Frayle

PS: For those who care, I will try to post a little more often during the coming year…

 

 

Songs For The Winter Holiday…

Posted in Humour and Jokes, Just a Thought with tags , , on December 27, 2009 by AF

Rudolph the red nosed reindeer

Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer

had a very shiny nose.

And if you ever saw him,

you would even say it glows.

    ~

All of the other reindeer

used to laugh and call him names.

They never let poor Rudolph

join in any reindeer games. 

~~~~~

Additional Government advice for celebrating the Winter Holiday…

You are advised that under the Equal Opportunities for All policy, it is inappropriate for persons to make comment with regard to the ruddiness of any part of Mr. R. Reindeer. Further to this, exclusion of Mr R. Reindeer from the Reindeer Games will be considered discriminatory and disciplinary action will be taken against those found guilty of this offence.

A full investigation will be implemented and sanctions – including suspension on full pay – will be considered whilst this investigation takes place.

😆

Songs For The Winter Holiday…

Posted in Humour and Jokes, Just a Thought with tags , , on December 25, 2009 by AF

We Three Kings

We three kings of Orient are

Bearing gifts we traverse afar

Field and fountain, moor and mountain

Following yonder star

~~~~~

Additional Government advice for celebrating the Winter Holiday…

The gift of gold is still considered acceptable as it may be redeemed at a later date through such organisations as ‘cash for gold’ etc. Gifts of frankincense and myrrh, however, are not appropriate due to the potential risk of oils and fragrances causing allergic reactions. A suggested gift alternative would be to make a donation to a worthy cause in the recipient’s name, or perhaps give a gift voucher.

We would not advise that the traversing kings rely on navigation by stars in order to reach their destinations and suggest the use of RAC Route-finder or satellite navigation, which will provide the quickest route and advice regarding fuel consumption.

Please note: as per the guidelines for other animals from the RSPCA, the camels carrying the three kings of Orient will require regular food and rest breaks. Facemasks for the three kings are also advisable due to the likelihood of dust from the camels hooves.

😆

Songs For The Winter Holiday…

Posted in Humour and Jokes, Just a Thought with tags , , on December 24, 2009 by AF

Little Donkey

Little donkey, little donkey on the dusty road

Got to keep on plodding onwards with your precious load

~~~~~

Additional Government advice for celebrating the Winter Holiday…

The RSPCA have issued strict guidelines with regard to how heavy a load that a donkey of small stature is permitted to carry, also included in the guidelines is guidance regarding how often to feed the donkey and how many rest breaks are required over a four hour plodding period.

Please note: due to the increased risk of pollution from the dusty road, Mary and Joseph are required to wear face masks to prevent inhalation of any airborne particles. Additionally, the donkey has expressed his discomfort at being labelled ‘little’ and would prefer just to be simply referred to as Mr. Donkey. To comment further upon his height or lack thereof may be considered an infringement of his equine rights.

😆

Songs For The Winter Holiday…

Posted in Humour and Jokes, Just a Thought with tags , , on December 24, 2009 by AF

While Shepherds Watched

While shepherds watched

Their flocks by night

All seated on the ground

The angel of the Lord came down

And glory shone around

~~~~~

Additional Government advice for celebrating the Winter Holiday…

The Union of Shepherds has complained that it breaches health and safety regulations to insist that shepherds watch their flocks without appropriate seating arrangements being provided. As a result, it has been agreed that benches, stools and orthopaedic chairs will now be made available to them during working hours. Shepherds have also requested that, due to the inclement weather conditions at this time of year, they should watch their flocks via cctv cameras from centrally heated shepherd observation huts.

PLEASE NOTE: the angel of the lord is reminded that before shining his/her glory all around she/he must ascertain that all shepherds have been issued with glasses capable of filtering out the harmful effects of UVA, UVB and Glory.

😆

Songs For The Winter Holiday…

Posted in Humour and Jokes, Just a Thought with tags , , , on December 23, 2009 by AF

Jingle Bells

Dashing through the snow

In a one horse open sleigh

O’er the fields we go

Laughing all the way…

Additional Government advice when celebrating the Winter Holiday…

A risk assessment must be submitted before an open sleigh can be considered safe for members of the public to travel on. The risk assessment should also consider whether it is appropriate to use only one horse for such a venture, particularly if passengers may be of larger proportions.

Please note, permission must be gained from landowners before entering their fields and sleigh riders are reminded to avoid offending those not participating in celebrations: in puruance of that, laughter should be kept to a moderate level and not be loud enough to be considered a noise nuisance.

😆

Songs For The Winter Holiday…

Posted in Humour and Jokes, Just a Thought with tags , , , on December 22, 2009 by AF

The Rocking Song

Little Jesus, sweetly sleep, do not stir;

We will lend a coat of fur,

We will rock you, rock you, rock you,

We will rock you, rock you, rock you:

  

Additional Government advice when celebrating the Winter Holiday…

Fur is no longer appropriate wear for small infants, both due to risk of allergy to animal fur and for ethical reasons. Therefore faux fur, a nice cellular blanket or perhaps micro-fleece material should be considered a suitable alternative.

Please note, only persons who have been subject to a Criminal Records Bureau check and have enhanced clearance will be permitted to rock baby Jesus. Such persons must carry their CRB disclosure with them at all times and be prepared to provide three forms of identification before rocking commences.

😆