Ear Infection

I know this is an old joke, but it’s another one that I think has stood the test of time and I thought it deserved a bit of a (purely superficial) makeover.

Here’s what I came up with…

Joe had always been pretty healthy. Up until a few years ago, he’d hardly ever visited a doctor at all. Now that he’d reached the ripe old age of seventy five, although still pretty spritely for his age and relatively healthy, he’d spent more time at his doctor’s surgery in the past two years than during most of the rest of his life. The thing that never failed to annoy him was the way the doctor’s sanctimonious receptionist always insisted he should tell her what was wrong with him in front of a room full of other patients, which was often embarrassing.

It is annoying, isn’t it? I’m sure that most of us when faced with that question have rarely failed to think, “If I knew what was wrong with me I wouldn’t be here now – I’d have gone straight to the pharmacist and got some medication for myself.”

Anyway, on this particular day, Joe was not in the most forgiving of moods and approached the haughty receptionist without his usual good humour and easy going manner.

“Yes sir?” she asked. “And what are you seeing the doctor about today?’

Joe glared at the woman and, without batting an eyelid, he said, quite loudly, “There’s something wrong with my dick!”

The receptionist became irritated and scolded him, “You shouldn’t come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that!”

 “Why not? You asked and I told you,” he replied, testily.

“Because you’ve caused embarrassment in this room full of people,” she told him, equally sharply. “Couldn’t you have said there is something wrong with your ear or something like that and then discussed the problem further with the doctor in private?”

“You shouldn’t ask people questions like that in a roomful of strangers, if you’re worried the answer could embarrass people,” Joe growled, as he turned on his heel and walked out.

Five minutes later he returned and walked up to the receptionist once again. “Yes?” she demanded, smugly.

“There’s something wrong with my ear,” Joe said, innocently returning her questioning look.

The Receptionist nodded and smiled self-righteously. “And what is wrong with your ear, sir?”

Joe stared evenly into the superior gaze of the quite attractive, thirty something woman. “I can’t piss out of it,” he replied.

The rest of the room erupted with hysterical laughter.


6 Responses to “Ear Infection”

  1. I smiled…

  2. I’d forgotten this joke– Thanks, it made e laugh. My OB/GYN has a receptionist just like this 🙂

  3. I love it. The guy had a great sense of humor.

    • Yes… it’s the nice sense of the ridiculous that makes it funny – that and taking the wind out of the sails of officious people. 🙂

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