It’s Only Natural

I just want to know, young man - would you describe yourself as ... athletic?I’ve touched on (well, okay then, ranted on about) this subject before – the “age is just a number” thing. But the fact is that, although it’s entirely normal and quite understandable that most young (teenage and early twenties) guys want a red hot nymphet and young women are often similarly searching for  a young(ish) man with “Incredibly Athletic Stud” stamped across his superb pecs, once the hormones have settled down just a tad, it’s then that other considerations begin to assume a slightly greater significance. That’s when personality, drive, ambition, long term desires and needs, being a good husband/wife and so on start to take over – the whole “partnership” question – and those criteria can result in a very different choice.

I really do think those that make snap judgements about another person’s choice of partner have a bloody cheek! The ideals that are important to us and by which we select a long term partner are entirely personal and nothing to do with anyone else – we’re all different with differing requirements and things that turn us on/off. How dare someone else criticise what I or anyone else finds attractive or wants from a relationship? It’s this whole “I’m following convention, or the church, or whatever and I know best what’s right” thing. Bullshit! I hope experience has taught me what’s right for me in my particular circumstances and with my particular needs and desires, but I wouldn’t dream of suggesting that would be right for another, or even a good idea.

Nothing suits all of us – maybe not even a majority, but there’s no weird unwritten law that says we have to go with the herd, is there? If an older woman, perhaps a divorcee or a widow (maybe even with grown up kids) and who is maybe financially “comfortable”, wants a partner who’s a stud, then what’s that got to do with me? The chances are she’s developed enough  realistic savoir-faire to pick one who’ll be considerate when around her, have a younger outlook on life (maybe like her own?) and keep her satisfied in (and probably out of) bed. I’m pretty darned sure I don’t fit that description, so why should I care? It’s none of my bloody business, is it? Equally, if an older man can provide the stability, attentiveness and undemanding caring and support that a young woman may want, what’s wrong with that? The chances are that he’ll adore her way beyond the extent to which a younger man would and, even if the sex finally kills him off, he’ll at least die happy!

Why do we judge others in this way? What’s it got to do with us? Are we absolutely sure there’s not the slightest touch of envy involved there somewhere.


6 Responses to “It’s Only Natural”

  1. My theory is that insecurity is the underlying factor in passing that type of judgment. For example, ‘if person number 1 is happy with their choice of mates, did I make the wrong choice for myself? Am I missing something? Let me make myself feel better by talking them down a notch or two.’ Very kindergarten-like.

    My opinion concerning other people’s opinions about what I do? PARTY ON, DUDES! While you’re spectating, I’m living. 🙂

    I never liked young boys. When I was still in the single digits, my first ‘crush’ was Robert Wagner, an actor married to Natalie Woods. My first serious boyfriend was 12 years older than I was…I was 17. My first husband was 15 months older than I was and that only lasted 11 years. My chef husband is 15 years older than I am and we’ve been together 22 years. He grows more attractive to me on every level.

    To the women they call ‘cougars’, like Demi Moore? I say, “You go, girl! Live your life!”

    To everyone else I say, “If it’s legal and you aren’t hurting anyone else, have at it!”

  2. I say whatever works! Life is too short to worry about what other people think!
    Great post.

    • Exactly. If you can find something that works for you and another human being then, frankly, you’re WAY ahead of the crowd, whatever they claim. 🙂

  3. girl du jour Says:

    Those who judge are probably Repooplicans.

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