All The Advice In The World

It’s all out there – for women in particular – everything you need to become the perfect person, have an ecstatically happy and incredibly long life, full of love whilst you remain young and beautiful forever.

All you have to do is to follow these principles, or worship at that church, or believe in a particular mysticism, or take some potion and of course also use their incredibly expensive herbal cream, or whatever else it is that these people are selling, or want you to believe in – so they can make a huge profit.

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Yeah! Right! If you believe that crap, then you’re more gullible that I thought you were, honey!

If you want a full and happy life then the first thing you have to do is to get one – a life that is! A life that is yours and not someone else’s and you have to do it!

Of course, this could apply to anyone – male or female – but it’s particularly common and incredibly easy for women slip into a rut where they spend all their time caring and working for their children, husband/partner, extended family, or whatever and forget that they once had a life of their own – things that were important and mattered just to them and no one else.

Then, twenty years down the line they’re totally heartbroken when their significant other ups and runs off with a new, usually younger, babe who doesn’t have to give a damn about any of those things and is a person in her own right. Why do they do that? Simple! It’s because the new woman still has a mind of her own and is interesting, takes care of herself, is not predictable or always there like part of the furniture – and therefore she’s sexy and exciting to be with (and screw, of course).

This is your life, girl. As far as you know it’s the only one you’ll have. Live it!

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9 Responses to “All The Advice In The World”

  1. That’s right. But self-sacrifice, martyrdom, and running oneself ragged in pursuit of an unattainable perfection is tradition among women — who are caught up in all sorts of double-binds due to continuing inequality, overwork, conflicting expectations, and the seemingly endless criticisms put upon them. It’s not that they forget that they had lives of their own, it’s that domesticity strangles it out of them.

    • We-ell … I agree with all of that in principle, but the fact is that it’s in the woman’s power to change that – just don’t DO it!

      This is bordering in being a bit off topic, but hey, it’s my blog, so what the hell … The world will not change just because women would like it to be different. Stop worrying what men want (we all have a fair idea what that is and why not?! – if the truth be told it’s also what a lot of women want and, again, WHY NOT?).

      I’m not saying that men (or stereotypical male attitudes at least) aren’t perhaps the cause of the problem at the beginning, but men rarely like the result and women have a hell of a lot more power than they think they have.

      If women stopped allowing themselves to be dragged or tricked into stereotypical drudgery then we might get to the situation where men want what men want, women want whatever they want and there is bound to be some common ground in the middle. Which is the TRUE basis for future relationships.

      Women may want men, that’s nature and it’s good, but, for their own sakes, they should learn to be self-sufficient! Women who need a man or men should just get over it – fast – somehow – anyhow – and start being their own person, whatever some guy thinks of that. He can like it or do the other thing – it’s just too bad!

      • I agree with you. But you need to understand that for working-class and low-income women, marriage is not so much of a choice as it is an economic imperative.

        I live in a very poor neighborhood. I wish you could see how gender inequality and economic disparity can debilitate and deprive women of any real choices.

        What I said earlier is still true: domesticity is a drudgery.

        But poverty will take your soul.

        I really like your idealism. But there can’t be equal partnerships between men and women when men and women aren’t equal.

      • Yes, I understand exactly what you’re saying and yes, you’re absolutely right.

        However, I do think that ignorance and lack of education, rather than lack of money is really the problem (though the two things often go together).

        I don’t think men and women should be equal, or ever desire that – they are so very different and, if I believed in God, I’d thank him (or her?) every day for that!

        What men and women should both DEMAND is that they and their opinions, however different, are of EQUAL IMPORTANCE AND VALUE!!!!!!!

        Poverty is a problem for us all, but solve the education problem first and much of the poverty will go away.

        In fact, sexism like ageism and racism is just the same as every other negative “ism” – ALL MEN AND WOMEN EVERYWHERE ARE EQUALLY IMPORTANT. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like to see some assholes shot on sight, but that’s another argument entirely 🙂

        Domesticity often does turn into drudgery and IS almost always the enemy of relationship and frequently results in its death!

  2. One thing you are especially right about is where you said that it is within women’s power to change it, but they just don’t DO it.

    Believe me, I think about this every single day.

  3. Haha! Do you speak out loud when you write? And jump up and knock over the chair?

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